Faith & Culture

If you’ve followed along here recently then you definitely know that I have a baby on the brain. And it’s true our Baby Girl is coming soon and her pending arrival has opened up a whole new host of feelings. My heart is thrilled and beyond excited to meet her and learn how to be her mom. I waver back and forth between feeling calm, like the timing couldn’t be better, to panicking and making frantic lists of things we have to buy or get done before she comes.

I hear motherhood has a quick learning curve. And lately I have been fascinated by how cultures and mom’s around the world learn how raise their children. I never planned on living in a country different than the one I grew up in or raising my children bilingually. I am like a sponge soaking up information, noticing how moms care for their babies, respond to a cry or don’t, and realizing how different our cultural upbringing shapes how we think about parenting and kids.

I’ve been reading books on this topic. I find myself nodding along when moms describe things that other cultures do and how our first response if often to raise an eyebrow, give a stink eye and judge. But how there is often something to learn, maybe first and foremost about our own cultural values. I just downloaded and started I reading this book: How Eskimos Keep Their Babies Warm: And Other Adventures in Parenting (from Argentina to Tanzania and everywhere in between) thanks to my friend, Sarah, who is also raising a bilingual daughter. And I loved French Kids Eat Everything and I even put this book: Our Babies, Ourselves: How Biology and Culture Shape the Way We Parent on my registry because it looks so interesting to me.

{I am kinda counting on hours and hours of breastfeeding time to read. Is this totally unrealistic? just tell me now…}

A few days ago an article I wrote appeared on InCultureParent, a great online resource and link for parents anywhere.

This quote by Nicholas Day, author of Baby Meets World, influenced the whole piece:

“every society has what it intuitively believes to be the right way to raise a child.”

Here’s an except from the article:

In a few short months I will be a first time mom. So, like any U.S. mom-to-be, I have been doing my reading; bits of BabyWise and Attachment Parenting, WebMD and my favorite mommy blogs are always open on my browser. I mean what new mom doesn’t want to have the Happiest Baby on the Block? I am a firm believer that our U.S. culture convinces us if we read and plan ahead of time then we will be better parents. And yet somehow I know nothing in these books or websites will totally prepare me for the birth of our first baby.

Read the rest here.

Have you ever thought about how much of your own ideas about parenting and raising kids are influenced by our culture? And I wonder if even two US parents, bring their own sub-cultural expectations into raising kids? Thoughts? Do share.

{photo: taken in 2007 without permission of these two moms… If I were to re-take it I would probably ask their permission first and their names and how how old her baby is : ) }

Last Friday was International Women’s Day. I posted this on facebook and twitter:

Today my husband wished me a Happy International Women’s Day. Then he asked, “so when is International Men’s Day? #goodquestion #equality

And within minutes I was surprised by the responses and replies from men and women alike. Comments like “I’m pretty sure every other day is already international men’s day” or “Men have had thousands of years, you ladies deserve one day.”

•   •   •

On one hand I understand where these comments come from.  Men, especially white men, historically have had unprecedented power and access to things like property rights, voting, and leadership positions in both church and government. There is no argument; worldwide men have had more power and control. For centuries women were 2^nd class citizens if that, often no better than mere property. And I know first hand that in many developing countries around the world many women are no better off now than hundreds of years ago.

I know because I live in one of those developing countries. I live in Guatemala, a country where the machista attitude is still king and many women lack access to basic land rights, birth control options and education. It’s a country where family is valued above all else, but domestic violence is still quietly accepted as the norm. Change is happening, but slowly.

 •   •   •

I teach at an all girls’ schools in a small village called Santa Maria de Jesus. Each morning 120 indigenous Guatemalan girls in their brightly woven skirts and colorful blouses walk up the dirt road to come to school. They sit at wooden desks, one size too big, with their little brown feet dangling in plastic flip-flops. Many of these girls wouldn’t get to the opportunity to study otherwise, because preference is often given to their brothers. We always start with full class of 30 girls in 1^st grade, but usually only 1/3 of them make it to 6^th grade. I believe whole-heartedly in these girls and that by giving them access to education they will have more opportunities in the future.

I, if anyone get, believe in and celebrate, International Women’s Day, but it’s left me with a question:

In our pro-women, girls-only push, are we failing the next generation of young men?

Don’t we need groups for young boys? Groups that teach them what it means to work together? Don’t we need role models who will show how to respect women and serve them? How do we empower men to be wise leaders and humble learners? I don’t think that happens by just elevating and celebrating women.

 •   •   •

Guatemala has a large international community, NGOs from the US and Europe are on almost every city corner. Mission groups and churches have had a long history here as well. Thanks to a large international presence and many NGOs working on women’s rights, International Women’s Day is big deal here. In my local grocery store a handmade hung above the roses, “¡Feliz Dia de La Mujer!” My Facebook feed was full of empowering, encouraging posts honoring Guatemalan women. None of this bothers or upsets me in the slightest, but it does make me question. Why don’t I remember ever seeing a sign at the grocery story or a Facebook post about International Men’s Day? In fact I know very few organizations that are specifically working with boys or young men. I can name a few in the US, like Donald Miller’s Mentoring Project that are targeting boys who don’t have dad’s in their lives, but they seem to be few and far between.

It makes me wonder why and ask what the consequences will be? Don’t we need the next generation of men to grow up respecting, listening to and partnering with women? If we just focus on Women’s day and women’s rights where does that leave our next generation of men?

I believe, as I think Jesus modeled, that women and men are made equally in His image. Jesus constantly went against the culture to embrace the prostitute, the widow or the Samaritan women. In fact, the first person He revealed himself to was the woman at the well. He was radical in his treatment of women not as second-class citizens, but as beloved daughters. He gave worth to women, when society gave them next to nothing.

The church and our world clearly have a lot to learn in how we regard our daughters and young women. But do we also have something to learn about how we raise-up and teach our sons? Sometimes I wonder what would Jesus think of our 21^st century Girl-Power society. Would he wonder why we have neglected young men?

•   •   •

My husband and I are expecting our first baby in a few months and we are thrilled. A little girl. She will be half Guatemalan, half gringo. And you can bet money on it that I want her to have access to education and be able to dream big dreams. I want her to be listened to and respected because of who she is and what she knows, not how she looks. I want her to see people from her gender in Congress and leading companies and preaching in churches. I want my daughter to be celebrated on International Women’s Day. And I hope that one day, many years from now, she will meet a man, who was also celebrated on International Men’s Day.

In case you were wondering, International Men’s Day is November 19^th.

I may not live in the United States, but I believe that voting matters.

But I’ve been asking myself, does one vote really make a difference? Is it really worth registering online, downloading and printing out my ballot, signing it and then mailing it back to my home state of California before Tuesday November 7th?

yes.

Here’s why:

I believe voting is a privilege, not a right. And it’s a privilege that women in our country didn’t have until 1920! If it means a little extra “work” for me to honor and respect what women in the 1900s fought for then I’ll do it.

If you don’t take the time to be informed and vote, then you have absolutely no right to complain. I don’t think you ever like every politician in leadership, that’s a given. But in my opinion, if you don’t vote, you don’t get to complain.

Eugene Cho said it best in a recent tweet:

“Politics is important to me because it involves policies and policies impact people. Last time I checked people are really important to God.”

You know I won’t tell you how to vote. But I do know that the policies that our government makes affect people– both locally and abroad. It’s easy to get lost behind ridiculously expensive campaign budgets and snarky comments. But the truth is how we vote and who we vote for ultimately affects people. And I agree with Eugene, people are really important to God.

And maybe, most importantly voting gives us a chance to voice an opinion and disagree with people in power and each other. Considering certain governments in our world, I think this is a gift. We will always have two sides (and maybe more) to every political campaign. And maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe we need leaders who can be fiscally and socially conservative to help provide for the next generation, and we also need more liberal leaders who protect equality, the immigrant and the environment. Maybe what we really need are leaders who can learn to work together. And maybe that starts with us- the voters. If we can’t be civil, supportive or work together how can we expect out top politicians to do the same?

My family is a good example. I’m sure between the 6 of us we probably “cancel “out each others votes. We’re right down the middle: 3 of us lean toward the liberal side and another 3 of us vote republican through and through. But for the most part we all still get along. We come together for Holidays and sit at the table together. There may be some political banter and jokes, but for the most part we are civil even though our political perspectives differ greatly.

What would it look like if our nation did the same?

I’ve been following this group on twitter: ElectionDayCommunion. The idea is Christians from BOTH sides of the political spectrum come together and meet at the same table, the Lord’s table on Election Day. We acknowledge that we may cast a vote for the future leader of our country, but God wants us to remember that he is the leader of our lives.

I echo this prayer for tomorrow:

Prayer for the election

I have been home from CCDA for over a week and haven’t given myself much time to write or process the conference. Sometimes those two are one and the same for me; the writing and the processing that is. I think that’s what writers do– Because the very act of writing can help make sense of what’s swimming around inside.

So here’s my attempt:

CCDA brings people together; people from across the political spectrum, with different colors of skin and and a range denomination affiliations. Some come with dreadlocks, fresh out of college, others with strollers and kids on tow, and a few with their greying hair, and years of wisdom and experience. We sang in English, then Spanish and Mandarin. We heard speakers, preachers and professors from every walk of life.

A Palestinian Christian. A Native American from the Sioux Reservation.

A Duke professor. A  recovering addict. An 88-year-old son of a sharecropper from Mississippi.

There were some of speakers you’ve probably heard of: Shane Claiborne, Tony Campolo, Barbara Williams-Skinner, but there were probably even more that don’t have big names or famous book. They are every-day, extraordinary people who are working, serving and living in communities with the very people they serve. They presented workshops about:

Christian Community Development, Immigration Services, Racial Reconciliation,

Leadership Development, Toxic Charity, Social-Entrepreneurship, Welcoming Refugees, Acting White,

Combating Organizational Fatigue and Burnout, Mobilizing the Church to Address Systemic Injustice,

…and I could keep going.

My sister did one workshop titled, 9/11, Al Qaeda and your Muslim Neighbor. I probably learned more in that one hour than in any history class I ever took in school. She talked bout the Muslim faith, how our news-media represents both sides so poorly and what does it really look like if we are called to be neighbors and friends.

My Twitter-friend-turned-real-friend, Sarah and her husband did a fascinating workshop discussing the Multicultural family; looking at everything from cross-cultural marriage, raising bi-lingual kids and living biracially. I was all ears.

+   +   +

CCDA is definitely geared for people working in urban centers doing some kind of community development work, but much of what is discussed applies to churches, families, teachers and really anyone with a desire to be more intentionally involved in serving your community.

As a first timer to this kind of conference, what stands out to me is not the richness in our differences and unique perspectives; no, it was the shared commitment to keep asking what it means to do this together. 

How do we commit to keep loving Jesus and our neighbor?

How do we keep caring for the widow, the foreigner, the immigrant?

How are resources distributed and who has access to them?

How do we create a world where women are just as valued and heard as men?

What does justice look like in public eduction, tax laws, churches and neighborhoods in your community.

These are questions that were asked. And we keep asking together.

And just like we keep seeking Jesus and Justice and asking these important questions. CCDA recognizes that we also must keep asking for forgiveness. And keep acknowledge what we have done wrong in the name of the Church and capitalism and consumerism.

Reconciliation is not possible, until there is an acknowledgement of the wrong, the pain, and the grief. Sometimes, reconciliation needs to make way for lament, before rejoicing appears. Maybe reconciliation and any kind of justice seeking starts with an apology and a prayer.

Father forgive me. Forgive us.

++ If you’re still reading I’m impressed ++ And, if you just skimmed to this part, you’re in luck++

In no particular order here one some of my favorite quotes from the conference. I’m working on putting together a book list, but that will be another post.  For now:

When will a nation of immigrants apologize to the indigenous  population?” -Richard Twiss, question from a Native American

“We cannot fall into the trap of us and them. If you want to follow Jesus you have to love your enemy? Who is your enemy? -Sami Awad, Palestinian who uses nonviolent approaches to end the Israeli occupation

“One of the most important things you can provide for a man is a job.” – John Perkins, on Empowerment

“You know how it goes…If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. If you teach him to fish, you feed him for a lifetime. Well, it’s not true. Whoever owns the pond, controls how long you fish. It’s not just teaching a man how to fish. You gotta have capital. That’s empowerment.” -John Perkins, discussing Christian Community Development

“Reconciliation is as big as bridging the biggest social divide, but it’s also as SMALL as loving the person who irritates you the most.”
- Chris Rice, “Theology of Reconciliation”

“We have one of the best productive system in the world, but one of the worst systems of distribution.”-John Perkins, on Stewardship
“The Psalmist did not say be busy and know that I am God.” -Rey Rivera, on Rest

“We’ve made God into a white, middle-class American, but what does Jesus of the bible say?” - Shane Claiborne, on his new book “The Red Letter Revolution”

“I wish we had the same courage for reconciliation as we do for taking up the sword, war, and guns.” - Tony Campolo

“After going oversees for a one year service project, my friend noticed, that students returned more committed to Justice, but less committed to Jesus.” - Chris Rice, on not taking the Jesus out of Justice

“Don’t give people what they don’t need. No one wants your used clothes. If you’re gong to feed people, eat with them. If you have a food bank, make it your goal to shorten the line. People want a job and to be a part of something, not just to keep receiving your food.” -wisdom, straight from Mr. John Perkins

And this was perhaps this most powerful, raw example of the beginning of reconciliation: A Korean American’s Confession

P.S. CCDA 2013…Don’t miss it: New Orleans. September 11-14.

P.S.S. If you want more info from this years conference check out Twitter #CCDA2012

If you’re reading this I am guessing you have either:

a) been on a short-term mission trip or b) sent money to someone going on one.

Now, I could write a whole book about the benefits and limitations of short-term mission trips. I have seen short-term mission trips go very well or very, very badly.

The organization that we work for hosts teams of college students, youth groups, churches and rotary club members throughout the year. A big part of my job is coordinating the details so those groups come prepared and our Guatemalan staff is empowered to host them. We work hard to help these groups understand that their role is to serve, learn and catch a vision of what God is doing here. If you have been one of the people who has come to serve and learn in Guatemala with us, I have nothing to say but thank you. I really enjoy what I do and the people I get to meet.

So, Why Do We Serve?

Now, weather you consider yourself a religions or spiritual person, or have ever taken a mission trip, I’m guessing some of the times that you have felt the best about yourself were times when you were helping other people, right? And I’m guessing being generous once encouraged you to want to keep living generously. Because you probably learned whether consciously or subconsciously that being generous is contagious. It gave you a sense of dignity and empowerment, right? And I believe we were created to serve other people, because maybe it’s only then that we realize that living for ourselves is not the way we want to live.

The thing is having the opportunity to serve oversees or locally is just that- an opportunity. By definition it means you know how to make that happen, you know where to go and how to raise support so that you can serve.  Gerber and I are firm believers that GENEROSITY is a POWERFUL AGENT of CHANGE both on an individual level and in a larger community.

However, what can happen in short-term missions is that well-meaning people come from other countries to give, but in the process take away an opportunity from someone else in the host country. There are not simple answers. We fall into patterns that have been reinforced historically, economically and politically for years. Some people or countries (in this case, Guatemala) get very good at being receivers, and others (in this case, the States) become very good at being givers. But we if tried to change it? What if we did something different?

The truth is we need to BE both. Givers and receivers. As individuals, as communities, as churches, as teachers, and countries. We need to be both, givers and receivers.

Guatemalans Helping Guatemalans

This October we want to provide Guatemalan students the opportunity to serve other Guatemalans.  These 12 students may not have the same kind of resources that you or I have, but they want a chance to be generous. They want a chance to serve people in their own country, in their own language and own culture.

We’re taking them to a community where we’ve been working the past few months, a village called Coyolate. In the southern part of Guatemala where the humidity sticks to your skin and beads of sweat still form at 8 at night, are about 40 families who live on Government “donated” land.  After their own communities disappeared during the civil war, many people fled to Mexico as refugees and when they returned they were given this land in 2000. The community school was just completed in 2004.

We’ll sleep under mosquito nets, and spend days mixing cerement, and building water filters with families. We’ll probably eat a lot of eggs, beans and tortillas and I’m sure if my husband has anything to with it, there be a few chamuscas played on dirt fields with tall sticks marking the goals. We’ll have debriefs in the evenings and some activities with the local school. At one of our recent meetings when we told the students to bring their bathing-suit. They looked confused. Why? They asked. We will shower by bucket without the privacy of walls and curtains. Hence the appropriateness of a bathing suit

And more than anything that we accomplish during that week, we hope these students will understand that if you say you want to follow Jesus, then what you DO often means far more than what you SAY.

Like any trip it costs money to do this. Food, transportation, supplies, etc.

These students have been working hard, really hard. They have been selling cookies and muffins at recess, hosting garage sale kind of events, asking fellow students and community members to raise money. So far they have raised about $705 — which when you’re doing it by collecting fichas in increments of 2-3 quetzales (roughly 25 cents) that’s A LOT. And we want to match their effort.

Will you help us?*

*Watch this video they made to find out more or go to here and scroll down to Healthy Communities and write “Student Mission Trip” in the note.

Yesterday as I scrolled through facebook and twitter I was struck by the images of valiant firefighters and #9/11 and #neveforget hashtags.

Twelve years ago, on a Tuesday morning, September 11th, our nation suffered immense loss. 2,996 people died in one day. However, why don’t we remember the more than 100,000 Iraqi’s who have died since we invaded the country in 2003?

War is complicated and politics are messy and I don’t claim to be an expert in either. But I do know that loss is loss. And you can’t qualify or quantify it. September 11th was horrible day in our country’s history. As a nation we define and mark time before 9/11 and after 9/11. A lot changed after that one day. Especially for people who lost someone they loved.

*  *  *

Dads on flights who never got to see their kids again.

Wives’ whose last memory of their sweetheart is a voice-mail recording made while stuck in the 2nd tower.

Moms who never saw their sons again.

Brave firefighters who were attempting to save others, but never made it out.

Officers in the Pentagon at the start of what they thought was a normal Tuesday, didn’t leave to see the end of it.

Kids born in the months after 9/11 have grown up never knowing their fathers. (In fact ABC has followed them and their families and you can can get an inside look at some of their stories, pain, and loss since 9/11)

A twenty-two year old with a ring purchased to propose to his fiance never had a chance to ask her.

This lists makes me sad. My heart aches imagining what if it was me? What if the flight that I was expecting my husband to arrive on never landed? What if I never saw him again?

For many this day is a reminder of what and whom you lost. And I cannot imagine the pain and sadness you still feel.

*  *  *

But there’s another side.

There always is. And this so-called “other side” is one that we don’t hear a lot about. In fact I have a feeling some pretty important people, pay some pretty big money so we don’t hear about the number of civilian casualties in Iraq.

We don’t hear that as of July of this year between 108,430 to 118,484 Iraqi civilians have died. 

We don’t hear about the Grandmother who had to watch as her son got shot in the head.

We don’t hear about the kids who went to play in street and were at the wrong place at the wrong time, because they will never play again.

We don’t hear about the family that was in their apartment eating breakfast when the bomb dropped. All of them dead.

We don’t hear about the wife whose husband went to the market to buy khubz, Iraqi flatbread, and never returned.

We don’t hear those stories. And those stories too should make our heart hurt.

*  *  *

I am not saying that mourning and remembering for the loss of our own nation is wrong. Not at all. But I am saying that it’s incomplete if we don’t also mourn and remember some of the very people that our nation – “in the name of freedom“-  has been responsible for their death.

Sometimes I wonder if our patriotism desensitizes us to our humanity?

And the same question could be asked of any nation, but as a US citizen I write from my perspective. And as a Christian, I wrestle with understanding what it means to “love your enemy” more than your flag.

Donald Miller, author and speaker, posted this on twitter yesterday and it is my prayer for myself and my country:

“The world will have really changed when on this day we talk about justice and forgiveness. #9/11″

What is your prayer after 9/11?

Do you agree that our patriotism desensitizes us to our humanity? If not, why?

For more info about what happened after 9/11… in the war in Iraq:

-A heart wrenching video looking at the civilians death in Iraq: What the US news doesn’t show

-The UK group Iraq Body Count

-What the US Govt hasn’t revealed about civilians death

photo credit: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/video/2010/oct/22/iraq-war-logs

I would call myself a Christian. But there have been seasons of my life where those words have felt weighted by the need for a disclaimer.

I’ve wanted to stamp a SURGEON GENERAL’S WARNING on my backpack: I’m not like those Christians. I do not always vote republican, I deeply care about our environment and I don’t think your sexuality defines who you are or what rights you have.

I don’t get think that Jesus would be too happy with my need to qualify what it means to be a Christian. He seemed to be above all of that stuff.

A New Church

G and I have been attending a new church near Guatemala City. Being in someone’s home, with a community of people who are willing to be challenged and committed to keep asking good questions, makes the 45-minute drive on a rainy, Sunday afternoon worth it. The messages are video-casted in from a church in Atlanta, called North Point. And this week Andy Stanley’s message was not only challenging, but also a bit controversial. Maybe that’s why I respect him and the church community we’re part of.

He called it what it is.

Christians- we, myself, people in the church- are sometimes the biggest hypocrites.

Crowded together on wooden benches and white plastic chairs last night we sat and listened.

Andy talked about how Christians have used the bible to justify horrible things in our history- the enslavement of fellow human beings, the persecution and genocide of Jews, the abuse and subordination of women, the right to wealth and power, and I could go on and on. The thing is we can use theology to justify anything. People have done it for years and it’s quite scary, really because we still do it.

The Danger of The One Verse

Every side of every issue has a verse. Just ask them. It’s easy to pull a single verse out of the bible to prove your point.

I realized in some ways we all do this.

The truth is if you call yourself a follower of Christ or a Christian, you too have chosen parts of the bible to ignore. We do this pick-and-chose-dance based on context, and theology or what your church tradition and current culture tells us is acceptable.  Last time I checked I didn’t know any women in modern evangelical churches who have their heads covered or any men walking around with their right eye gouged out from lusting after a woman.  And as far as I know, most us have not sold all of our possessions and given them to the poor.

In someway or another most of us ask ourselves what was the intent of the commander, not just what was the commandment.

One of the things I love about Jesus, is that he knew we would do this. The Pharisees did it back then. They asked things like, “Well, how close can I get to breaking the law, without actually breaking it?” Or they’d question Jesus like a bossy older sibling, “How come your disciples don’t follow the rules and wash their hands before they eat?” (Matthew 15)

A New Commandment

But Jesus responds. And not with rules and laws, but with a new commandment. A new commandment that encompasses all the rest of them. A commandment that Jesus lives out to the fullest, and I believe has so much potential for good when we can learn to do the same.

He says:

Love one another. In the same way I have loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples- when they see the LOVE you have for EACH OTHER

(John13:34, The message- italics added for emphasis)

That’s it.

Wouldn’t it be cool if one day someone said… hey, I know they’re Christians because of they love that they have for each other?

I don’t think this implies that we will all agree or come to some universal mutual understanding and vote for the same political party. I think being a follower of Christ leaves room for diversity and difference of opinion, but there is no question that if I chose to call myself a Christian than I have a responsibility to ask myself daily: What does love require of me?

What does love require of me?

What does love require of me each morning, each day, while I wash dishes or wait in line at the bank?

What does love require of me when I read facebook posts that I whole-heartily disagree with? Or when I see an old man with a beard and a bible clenched under his arm proselytizing in the park?

What does love require of me when I watch news broadcasts with Christians holding up hate posters against gays and lesbians? Or when Christians with very good intentions would rather hand out candies and t-shirts in the name of Jesus, instead of learning about development and empowerment?

What does love require of me when I want to control a situation in order to get my own way? Or when I want to be generous only when it benefits me? What does love require of me when I chose to ignore someone else’s needs because of my power or position?

What does love require of me?

I think I know the answer. But sometimes it’s a lot harder to live out, than it is to write about.
How do I chose to act differently? To speak differently? And to not do exactly what makes me so frustrated in the first place? Respond in anger, or disgust, or with excuses and judgement?

Whether you call yourself a Christian or not…

Will you join me in asking this question…What does love require of me? How do we live it out every day?

P.S. you can watch Andy Stanley message or the full series online at: http://www.northpoint.org/messages/christian

I have fond memories of watching the Olympics ever since I was a 9-year-old sitting on the edge of the couch, staying up way past my bedtime to see if Kim Zmeskal and Shannon Miller would win a medal at the 92′ Barcelona games. Twenty years later I sat on the edge of my couch watching the Olympics once again, but this time I am in Guatemala. And I watched the Olympics on a Latin American station, with no Ryan Seacrest, with no nightly medal count and maybe most refreshingly, with Spanish commentators who had more positive things to say than negative.

•   •   •

I have heard it said that it takes about two years to really adjust and begin to understand a new culture, and that it takes even more time to fully analyze and understand your own culture. Sometimes it’s hard to see and understand the cultural values that are deeply embedded in us because we don’t know anything different.

But now I do. I am beginning to see and know a different way of life. A new country. A different understanding of cultural expectations and values that makes me also question and re-look at what my own country has taught me. And it has never been more apparent to me than as I watched the Olympics. The US sent 530 Olympic athletes to the games in London- 530 athletes who come from top training programs, expert coaches and entire lifestyles and training camps focused on making them the best. Success is measured by how many golds we earn and we keep track to make sure our medal count is ahead of China. We like athletes who win and also who happen to look good while winning.

Now compare that to Guatemala. If the US is the Olympic Goliath, than Guatemala is the David.

Guatemala is about the size of Tennessee and has roughly 14 million people. We sent 19 athletes to the games in London. One of the local papers here celebrated these 19 before they even boarded the plane to London. Because in Guatemala just to make it to the Olympics is a huge honor. Many athletes spend their weeks working full-time and training. There are no such things as sponsors or a national Olympic training center. To be an Olympic athlete is seen as nothing less than a privilege. Don’t get me wrong every athlete at the Olympic level has worked extremely hard and deserves the right to represent their country and compete, but the attitude and expectation is different in Guatemala. Let me show you:

1) The Olympic Coverage: In the states Olympic coverage tends to only show the top three contenders or super-powers, which since the US is always in the top three for nearly every sport, there’s no problem. Since gymnastics was been my favorite sport growing up I used to think the only gymnasts competing came from the US, Russia, Romania or China. That’s all the broadcasts showed. This year however on my local channel 13, when I watched the night of the Olympic Gymnastics qualifying round I saw gymnasts from Basil, Italy, Greece, Venezuela, Switzerland, Guatemala and of course, the US, China and Russia.

2) Matter of Perspective: I was particularity struck at how Victoria Komova, the Russian gymnast who “lost” the gold medal to Gabby Douglass in the Women’s All-Around Gymnastic event, was crying after she saw the score. Her head hung low, buried in her knees as she sat on the chairs because she “lost” the coveted gold medal and only got the silver. She was disappointed, and maybe rightfully so for being so close. But, now meet Ana Sofia Gomez Porras, Guatemala’s only Olympic Gymnast since the 1992 games. The 16-year-old performed solid qualifying day routines and was excited and honored to get a chance to compete in the Women’s All Around finals. Before she even competed the media here was ecstatic. She finished in 22nd place out of 24 gymnasts. In the US you would have heard the commentators say something along the lines of, ” and 2nd to last is Ana Sofia from Guatemala.” But not here.  Do you know how they announced it here in Guatemala? “Ana Sofia is the 22nd best gymnast in the world!” 22nd best. Not 2nd to last. Maybe just a matter of perspective, right?

3) Erik Barrondo: You probabaly haven’t heard this name, unless you follow race-walking (yes, it’s an Olympic sport) or Guatemalan Olympians. Erick is a 21-year old Guatemalan Olympian who was born in a poor, indigenous village near San Christobal Verapaz, about 5 hours away from Guatemala city. Erick started out training as a middle distance runner, but due to an injury his coach encouraged him to try race walking.

This is a picture of him in front of his home after he won a gold medal at the Pan America Games last year. Before he left for London he bought his parents a TV so they could watch him compete.

And last Saturday he competed in the 20k race-walk and won the silver medal. Let me clarify…

He won Guatemala’s FIRST Olympic medal EVER.

You can imagine what it felt like to be in a country where they had never watched one of their own athletes on the podium. Gerber and I watched from a local coffee shop last Saturday morning as Guatemalans cheered and screamed as Erick crossed the finish line. He stood on the podium, next to two men from China, and received his silver medal with a humble pride. You can read more of his inspirational story here or watch this:

Erik told a reporter after he won:

“I feel like this is the biggest privilege life has granted me…to win the first Olympic medal for Guatemala. It’s a country that has suffered much, but it also has dreamed much.”

•   •   •

It makes me wonder if that gratefulness wears off in the US because, for better or worse, because we are used to winning gold. Can there be too much of a good thing?

I value my country’s effort to create a land of opportunities and unlimited access to things that most people in the world could never imagine having. But I sometimes mourn the fact that we become greedy and focused on winning for the sake of numbers, for a score. It seems that we easily forget the individuals and the honor that it is to simply compete in the Olympics. We forget to give thanks and acknowledge what a privilege it is to represent one’s country, even if there were no endorsement offers, no parades, no promises of fame and glory.

I like that the attitude deeply embedded in Guatemala is different. Nothing is taken for granted. Gratefulness is the only expectation. Not gold medals.

When you grow up in the states and go from being a student right back to being a teacher June begins to hold a special meaning. For 25 years of my life June signified the end of another school year, and the start of summer. There was a natural rhythm to one thing ending and another beginning.

I love summer. Days get longer, nights warmer and kids and adults both seem to play more. There’s beach BBQs and slip-n-slides and the smell of sunscreen and watermelon. When we were growing up most summer days we lived in our swimsuits, running through sprinklers or in and out of our neighbor’s pool. We’d gather around our outdoor picnic table for dinner and ten minutes later,  jump down with bbq chicken staining our cheeks and half eaten corn on our plates.  Still wearing our swimsuits, we ran through the backyard sometimes until 9 at night, just as the California sun set behind the trees.

•    •    •

But now June signifies something different. School doesn’t end in Guatemala until October and the months of June through August are characterized by rain. Summer feels different now. And sometimes to be quite honest I get a little sad in June. I can’t quite describe it or pinpoint why. Maybe that’s what change brings. A little grieving and loss.

I was in the states last week for a visa renewal trip and realized it was two years ago this June that I moved down to Guatemala. If you’re new here or don’t know the whole story you can read what my plan was in 2010 here. It’s funny to me now that I wrote :

“I believe in taking risks, being bold and listening to that still, small voice inside that says “go” even when you don’t know where you’re going.”

Little did I know how true that would be.  I listened to that still, small voice and left Santa Barbara in 2010, not knowing that taking risks and being bold meant I wouldn’t be moving back.

•    •    •

And then last year in June, I wrote this in the middle of emptying out my storage unit and selling all of the things that had made Santa Barbara home for 9 years. I was still getting used to an engagement ring on my left hand and shopping for wedding dresses in fancy stores, while also coming to grips that I was leaving and letting go of Santa Barbara for good. I was excited for a future in Guatemala with the man I loved, but I knew the next time I came to Santa Barbara I would be a visitor. It would no longer be home.

•    •    •

And now June 2012, here I am, sitting inside on a rainy afternoon. (Quite prophetic as I write about missing summer, huh?) And I realize the moving to Guatemala may have been the single biggest change in my life, but also the most rewarding. Of course I still miss things from the U S of A- I always will. Things like carpet and chocolate covered soy nuts, free-Amazon shipping, Pandora and return policies. There is no Target here, nor Trader Joes, no runs by the beach and leaving your front door unlocked. And until someone invents a teleportation system I only get to see my closet friends and family a few weeks out of the year.

•    •    •

Those are the losses. And I’ve learned I have to give myself permission to acknowledge them. And feel them.

But there is so much more that I have gained. (Besides my incredible husband)

Living in Guatemala makes me grateful- consistently grateful. •  I have learned to live with less and be ok with it. •  I have learned that for me what is sometimes an inconvenience (a rainy afternoon), is necessary for someone else’s livelihood (a farmers’ corn harvest). • Guatemala does a great job of reminding me that I am not in fact in control. •  I cannot control the weather, the road closures and what food there will be in the market.  •  Living here as a visitor, or better yet a foreigner, has challenged all of my ideas about how we, in the U.S. treat our visitors and foreigners.  •  And living here as allowed me to learn a new language and culture, and see my own with a new perspective.  •  I have learned the joy of trying new things, making mistakes and having to ask for help. •  I am often reminded how big God is and how small I am. •  My credentials don’t matter here, but how you treat people does. And I love that.

Shauna Niequest, an author who I adore for her honesty and authenticity wrote this for a commencement speech recently:

“Pay attention to what moves you, what you love, what makes you angry, what makes you exhausted.  There are no right answers to those kinds of questions, but if you don’t pay attention, you may find yourself several years down the road, living a life that looks good on paper, but doesn’t ring true to the deepest parts of you. That’s a terrible place to be. Become a student of what you love, because what you love flows out of the way God made you.”

I couldn’t agree more. Sometimes I look back and realize that I was living a life that looked good on paper, but didn’t ring true to the deepest parts of who I was.

It feels good this June to be in a place where I am a student of what I love.

I am a student of Spanish and of new cultures, of my husband and new family, of teaching and seeing God in new ways.

Are you a student of what you love?

Gerber and I have the joy (and challenge) of working together most days.

Some days we have meetings with staff members, other days we’re in the office planning for the next team.

There are lots of emails, lots of discussions and lots of Spanglish back and forth.

I still teach English once a week, and he coordinates future water filter projects and meets with community leaders.

But when we have teams, we usually work together.

after a days work

I am the planner, arranger and schedule maker.

And He makes everything happen. And sometimes not according to schedule. (imagine that)

If I’ve learned anything, it’s that sometimes his way of doing things just works better than mine. The problem is I usually don’t realize this until after I’ve argued and convinced him to do something my way.

(hey, we’re still learning.)

At our best we work together seamlessly; like peanut butter and jelly.

Or like corn tortillas and frijoles if you want the Guatemalan equivalent.

He’ll share with a group of Guatemalans in Spanish, while I translate to English. Then we switch. I’ll share with the team of volunteers in English, and he translates to Spanish. We welcome conversations and questions about faith and culture and differences because we live it each and every day. In our marriage. In our work. In our life here in Guatemala. Our passion to love God and serve other people aligns perfectly, but learning how to live that out in practical ways often leaves us asking how?

When we’re at our best we (hopefully) model what it means to serve, support and bring out the best in each other.

When we’re at our worst, we get easily frustrated and irritated with each other, and our different way of doing things. I find myself saying, well, if you’d just do it like this______, then we wouldn’t have that problem. We both think we’re right. And that our way works best. And in some ways we both are probably right.

But marriage doesn’t work very well when you try to be right.

The challenge of working together (and doing life together) is that we both can’t do things the way we used to.

so, we are learning new ways of doing things.

And we get to practice often, as we work with a lot of teams from churches, universities, high schools and rotary clubs.

Here’s a little look into part of what we do:

huge thanks to the team from Pepperdine University and the video skills of David Chang ©2012